


"Someone's a little salty"

by Thranduilsassyking



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Fluff, Funny, M/M, Prank War, emobodiment of salt and extra
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-05
Updated: 2017-07-05
Packaged: 2018-11-23 18:20:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11407941
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thranduilsassyking/pseuds/Thranduilsassyking
Summary: A little promt i got from Tumblr. Bull switches Talasan's coffee sugar with salt.





	"Someone's a little salty"

**Author's Note:**

> It's really short i'm sorry buit it's worth it.

The Iron Bull loves pranks, absolutely loves them. They keep everyone on their toes, and it’s a great insight into those around you. Great team bonding exercise is what he’d tell anyone who’d ask. Talasan picked up on this early in their relationship, Bull was always one step ahead though and that only served to fuel the fires of Talasan’s drive to bring down Bull, the undefeated champion in the ongoing prank war. Only Krem has ever gotten close, and that was only once he’d mixed in an Antivian itching powder and a floral scented Orleasian muscle relaxant into Bull’s horn cream. Krem ended up with a scalp that was simultaneously numb while feeling as though ant were crawling through it. Bull never loses. He takes great pride in his ability to prank and the chaos it can cause.  
It was early in the morning, the sun had barely rose fog clung low to the grounds of Skyhold. Few would brave the cold of the early morning save for those who had duties to attend and of course the Inquisitor. He rarely sleeps for long anymore, a side effect of the job. He made his morning half-dead trudge across the grounds to the tavern to acquire coffee his deep red hair still touseled from sleep further driving home the whole 'dead man walking' look, the magical liquid to cure sleepiness and grant awareness! It was one of the best things about being Inquisitor, he never knew how he made it his whole life without it.  
“Morning Kadan” Bull said with a smile Talasan planted a quick kiss on Bull’s forehead and sat down next to him. The smell of the mug of coffee that was set before him granted him a little shot of awakeness enough so that Talasan could grab the sugar container and begin shoveling it into his coffee. While he did this Bull watched with a hidden intensity barely able to withhold the smile threatening to spread across his stony grey features. Krem had tried to subtly move to the table closest to the Inquisitor.  
Talasan lifted the mug to his lips pausing momentarily his eyes gazing of the rim of the mug some of the ‘sugar’ was still stuck to the side of the mug Talasan slowly sipped the coffee. Bull had replaced his sugar with salt. The audacity! Sacrilege! Disgrace to the beauty that is coffee. He will not get satisfaction from this horrid deed of fanatical proportions. Talasan though as he glared at Iron Bull chugging the entire 18 ounce of salty coffee. Bull’s eye subtly grew wider Krem’s mouth fell open in pure shock the book he’d been ‘reading’ fell from his fingers. Talasan’s cup hit the table with a resolute thud! And he released a sigh and contentment showing he thoroughly ‘enjoyed’ the coffee. He rose slowly  
“You know of course, that this means war” Talasan said quietly and strode away in search of the requisition officer he had need of a herd of Nugs, a trumpet, and an Orleasian nobility mask. As he walked away Krem allowed himself to finally laugh  
“Someone’s a little salty” Iron bull said and burst into deep, heavy laughter slapping the table.


End file.
